Crash!

We interrupt this fascinating debate between Oprahbama and Billary on the subject of "Who's Johnny?" to bring you some breaking news.

This just in! According to our normally quite reliable sources there was a major accident which occured last Saturday morning. In the very early morning. Or was it very late Friday night?

Witnesses on the scene saw the white male victim flee the scene of the accident. He was described as tall, bald, extremely handsome with a great body! If you see this man, and you are a cute funny intelligent single woman, please call him!

According to a police report the incident occured when this subject entered a cab at the infamous Coconuts. The cab was randomly picked from a bunch of screaming, begging, pulling and pushing cab drivers. A bit like the middle-aged women in the front row of a Tom Jones concert.

The victim - not suspecting anything - got in the car and instructed the cabbie to take him to his hotel. The driver obeyed and took off. As he was speeding up on the Marginal (a long straight road along the coast line), the passenger relaxed and looked around him as if he longed for yet another drink.

All of sudden it happened! Loud screetching tires and as the white male was launched forward he grabbed the seat in front of him and looked up at what was going on. His cab was still on the road, trying to brake as a red pickup truck came out of nowhere and crossed the street in the direction of the beach.

Where this truck came from and why it was heading that way is still a mistery. Maybe he lost control, fell asleep or was doing some midnight off road racing in the bushes...

Whatever! The taxi could not stop in time and hit this truck hard on the side. The cab passenger saw the hood of the car double up right in front of him as at the same time a car - coming from behind too fast to stop or avoid the scene - hit the taxi right behind the victims seat. This set the taxi off in a 270 degree spin.

Finally when all the dust was settled, the passenger checked himself and noticed that he was okay. The cab driver was a less pretty sight as he was bleeding like crazy from his forehead. Must've hit the steering wheel. However, he acknowledged that otherwise he felt fine.

Both got out of the car and so did the drivers of the other two vehicles involved in the crash. Our hero (the passenger) looked at the taxi and only now realised that he had been really lucky. Really really lucky! The engine block was diminished to half its size. That cab had had its last passenger. The official legal term being "total loss".

The red pickup driver was fine (of course! He had the truck) and so was the guy that hit the cab from behind. This last guy was furious! He was screaming and shouting at the pickup driver saying he would call the police. Funny thing of course is, that since he hit the taxi from behind, he is responsible for his own collision. Should've kept his distance.

The truck driver was very appologetic towards the cabbie and suggested to 'arrange' everything without police intervention. The furious guy got even more angry and in the meanwhile a curious crowd was gathering around.

This is when our male subject (yes, the handsome one!) decided that it was too late (04:30 am), too dark, too crowdy and he was way too visible to hang around much longer. He checked his vitals one more time and walked away from the crime scene.

The taxi guy got nervous and followed him saying that he couldn't leave as he was required to act as a witness. A witness to what? To testify that he was dozing off in the back before being rudely awaken by a car crash? (and that is a rude awakening, I can assure you).

He decided not to hang around waiting for possibly 2 hours before police had done all they needed to do, just to provide a statement which wouldn't be helpful at all. The physical evidence was more than obvious.

5 minutes later he was last seen speeding away in yet another cab. Destination unknown....

PS: Oh well, that was one adventure I do not necessarily need to experience again. Yes, I got really lucky, considering the damage, the way it could've ended up and the fact that I was in the back without seat belt. Before you start, most cars do not have seat belts in the back and most front belts don't function either... All in all, everything is fine. Not even some neck muscle pains. I even slept like a baby.