After an absence of three weeks, here's the African blogger again. Back in business! It is now Sunday afternoon and I'm sitting at Mundo's, the sports bar. On the screens there are two matches being played. On the large screen it's the rugby world cup, the biggest thing in this South African bar and on the small screen the final of the women's world cup football. As with the men the two countries which have played most finals face each other: Germany and Brazil. James just texted me saying that he's watching it too and it is as boring as women's basketball. Sorry ladies, but I have to agree.
I've been back now for a week after an extremely busy two weeks 'holiday' in Holland. It was so busy I heard myself say to someone: "I think I have an opening tomorrow morning between 10 and 11". This was supposed to be a holiday!!! But the two weeks were great! I know this is supposed to be a blog on Mozambique, but one entry on Europe couldn't hurt, could it?
As you know the trip started off on a wrong foot with the lack of fuel for my air plane, but I got lucky (thank you again, Mr Katanja). So I was back in Utrecht just an hour later than planned. To start off, that first day I already got shot to shambles. Death by needle as the medical services gave me a few more vaccine and tuberculoses related shots. After some more work related appointments I finally got to hang out with my friends at - where else? - Cafe Flater. That had been a long time and very enjoyable.
(By the way, I think a former Flater bar girl just 'fell' of the balcony of here actor boyfriend totally drugged and into a coma. You probably heard about it in the news this last week. It's on De Telegraaf with pictures and everything.Poor Kim).
Of course the highlights of the trip included live concerts of Prince and The Police and the visit to Spa Franchorchamps for the Formula 1 race! Let me start with Prince. As we were a bit late in booking a hotel, we ended up at a youth hostel. Last time I did that, I was actually a student visiting New York and staying at the local YMCA (No, that is not a gay bar for groups of guys dressed up as Indians, construction workers or police officers). Back then I swore never to do that again. Especially after I saw all the turds floating around the shared toilets just minutes after they actually cleaned it. Luckily this place, called the Vi.... ehh.... the Generator, was quite decent and relatively clean. Of course, I didn't dare touching a wall or shower curtain, but other than that, it worked out fine. Still again, the last time of course!
Prince was, well, Prince! Absolutely brilliant as a live artist. If you like live music you should definitely have done a Prince concert once in your life. Even if you don't like his music. What made it even better is that he only played his older songs, which increased the party feel as those are the songs all fans know by heart and let's face it, it was his best period. The absolute highlight though was at the end of the concert. It was over, lights were on, security was packing and people were leaving. When almost half of the people were gone, Prince just reappeared on stage wearing some sort of sweat suit and just started playing the piano. All by himself! People ran back, security guys had no clue what to do and we all went totally nuts. He played intros of his songs and then the audience did the lyrics. Absolutely brilliant!
There is actually some footage on his website of one of the London concerts. Check out a 10 minute set here.
Two days later it was time for The Police in Amsterdam. It was a good concert. They played all the favourites, Andy Summers is a great guitarist (better than I actually remembered) and it was the fulfilment of a childhood dream: seeing The Police live. And they really are one of the all-time best bands. Even now, it still sounds current and not old fashioned. However, it just is quite unfair to them (and I guess myself), to watch them live just two days after the purple one. But I'm happy I did.
Then it was time for the road trip with Frits. First to Maastricht on the Saturday, hang out there and party a bit and then, of course, the second leg to the Ardennes in Belgium for my first ever Formula 1 race. first of all, it is a very beautiful setting. A race track in the hilly forested area. Something wonderfully contrasting about seeing these mechanical wonders in between pine trees where you expect a grizzly bear to come at you at any second.
But what stuck most was the sheer impressiveness of these cars. They're fast, very very very fast! They are 10 times faster in real life than on television. And they make about 100 times more noise than you can even imagine! And so small! These are lawn mowers on some serious steroids! Rasmussen would race the Himalayas on this stuff!
And you know what I really missed during my stay in Maputo? That delicious 'Dutch' food! And I ate it all during these two weeks: Dim Sum, Pita Giros, Peking Duck Pancakes, Roti, Rijsttafel, Won Ton soup and of course the lovely Japanese twins Sushi & Sashimi! They're so yummie!
Then it was time to go back to Moz. After my two flights with Kenya Airways I had learned my lesson. This time I was doing my own luggage. First, no more KQ for me. Second, no thru-labelling of my suitcase. I flew KLM to Johannesburg and South African to Maputo, but I was getting my suitcase of the belt at JBG and checking it in again. It worked. The flights worked like a charm and I got back here on time and complete (meaning me and my suitcase made it together. we are so happy).
Sunday, 30 September 2007
Sunday, 9 September 2007
And The Winner Is...
After a small interruption, for which we would like to thank President Mugabe yet again, the blog is back on track with part 2 of the final quiz results.
7. How did former president Samora Machel die?
He was a Mozambican military commander, revolutionary socialist leader and eventually the Presdent. Machel led the country to independence in 1975 until his death in 1986, when his presidential aircraft crashed in mountainous terrain where the borders of Mozambique, Swaziland and South Africa converge. He is for the Mozambicans what Ataturk is for the Turks.
Machel's widow, Graça is convinced (like most of the country) the air crash was no accident and has dedicated her life to tracking down her husband's killers. In 1998, Mrs Machel married the then South African President Nelson Mandela. She thus became unique in having been the first lady of two different nations, although not simultaneously.
In 2006 it was reported that the South African government is to reopen the inquiry into Machel's death. The Minister of Safety and Security, told reporters in Parliament: "We owe it to the people of Mozambique to ensure the matter is thoroughly investigated. Discussions are under way for dealing with the matter." All of South Africa's law enforcement agencies are expected to be involved in the probe, in co-operation with their Mozambican counterparts. We're still waiting for that one...
8. On what street will our bank open its doors?
And that would - surprisingly - be the Avenida Samora Machel. The bank will open right next to the Gil Vicente movie theatre and Gil Vicente cafe, a jazz/blues blues club described in one of my earlies postings. Across the street there's park with next to it the Iron House designed by Eiffel.
It's a sharp contrast towards where we are now. Our current temp offices are in the middle of a very posh residential area. If I look out the windows there's no way you can tell you're in Africa. Okay, apart from the guards that stand in front of every house.
9. What will be the name of this bank?
BANCO TERRA, O BANCO DA NOSSA TERRA! Say it loud and say it proud! (Guess the movie!) Why do I say it proud? Simply because I am at the roots of this bank. Not just a bank. No, the first real Mozambican commercial bank! It is not a foreign bank that opened a branch here, but a local bank. Admittedly funded for a large part by European money, but still a local bank. Let us have a look at my crystal ball..... The year is 2026 and I'm sitting in an Cuban stadium in Havana watching the world cup football semi-final between Holland and Mozambique. On the bench, the African reserve players and coaches are wearing jackets with the Banco Terra logo on it and I lean over to your grandchildren and say "did you know that uncle Roberto was in the small team that set up that bank?" How cool would that be!? I am, of course, referring to Holland being in a semi final...
10. What type of nut is available in huge numbers in this country?
I loooooooove nuts. I hardly eat chocolate, candy or crisps. When I want to much on something, it's nuts. Not peanuts, but actual nuts. I adore pistachios, walnuts, almonds, hazel nuts and my favourites: Brazil nuts and pecans. But no, here there's only one single nut available. The cashew nut. Together with macadamians my least favourite nut. And it is really the only one you can find here. I have not even seen cans of mixed nuts yet. Oh well...
11. Approximately how many times can you fit Holland in Mozambique?
This one nobody answered correctly. Even though it is quite simple to calculate. Go to the CIA's World Factbook (never leave home without it!) which you can find in the my links section on the right labelled "Facts & Figures" and look up the area sizes for both countries and perform the calculation. And you know, the CIA is never wrong! Never! And Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone! And Iraq had weapons of mass destruction! And Fidel Castro is still a major threat!
There's one slight issue with this calculation. The factbook states land, water and total area separately. Now what should you take? Do you compare land areas? Or do you compare total areas? My logic, but that is not necessarily your logic or any logic at all, says that thou shall take land area as including water is not totally fair. For example, Holland's water area is about 18% of the total area. And are territorial waters included? That would make Canada even bigger! Oh well, everybody answered 20 times, whereas comparing water areas gives you a factor of 19 (actually 19.3) and land areas results in 23 times bigger! On a side note, the population of Mozambique is 20 million, as opposed to 16 million in Cheeseland.
And in case more people got the same number of correct answers, we had the tie-breaker where the closest one to the correct answer wins.
12. How many beers were there on my July hotel bill?
This was obviously by far the toughest question. Okay, I admit. I do enjoy the occasional beer. Actually enjoy the regular beer even more! But I am a social drinker, meaning that I drink in company. For those of you who've been to my place and have had a look in my fridge - and since I'm the kind that will serve you once and after that just point at the refrigerator, most of the visitor have - will have noticed that there's very seldom beer in there. I do not drink beer at home and drinking in the hotel bar is a bit like drinking at home (No, I do not employ bar staff at home. I wish!).
So the number of beers on my hotel bill is actually limited to a few I had with colleagues staying in the same hotel. Actually the bill is tainted as the beers I offered to these colleagues are also on my hotel bill. But then again, the question did not refer to the beers I drank, but to the ones on the bill. The correct answer should've been..... drum roll........ 14! Yes, that is fourteen. The number made famous by that other J.C. That's logical!
So, now you know all the correct answers and know how many you had wrong. All entries have been carefully reviewed by Robertole Lopelulu Abukaramirez from the renowned, respected and trusted accounting firm Arthur Andersen and there was a clear winner. The tie breaker was not necessary as Frits beat out the rest by answering 10 out of the first 11 correctly. Parabens!
In the meanwhile the award ceremony was almost cancelled due to a lack of a prize. That was still inside my suitcase somewhere between Dar Es Salaam and Amsterdam. Luckily for me and Frits (and Kenya Airways), the suitcase found its way back to me. And only a day and a half later. Suitcase and owner are doing fine and can be visited during the day. Please make an appointment.
7. How did former president Samora Machel die?
He was a Mozambican military commander, revolutionary socialist leader and eventually the Presdent. Machel led the country to independence in 1975 until his death in 1986, when his presidential aircraft crashed in mountainous terrain where the borders of Mozambique, Swaziland and South Africa converge. He is for the Mozambicans what Ataturk is for the Turks.
Machel's widow, Graça is convinced (like most of the country) the air crash was no accident and has dedicated her life to tracking down her husband's killers. In 1998, Mrs Machel married the then South African President Nelson Mandela. She thus became unique in having been the first lady of two different nations, although not simultaneously.
In 2006 it was reported that the South African government is to reopen the inquiry into Machel's death. The Minister of Safety and Security, told reporters in Parliament: "We owe it to the people of Mozambique to ensure the matter is thoroughly investigated. Discussions are under way for dealing with the matter." All of South Africa's law enforcement agencies are expected to be involved in the probe, in co-operation with their Mozambican counterparts. We're still waiting for that one...
8. On what street will our bank open its doors?
And that would - surprisingly - be the Avenida Samora Machel. The bank will open right next to the Gil Vicente movie theatre and Gil Vicente cafe, a jazz/blues blues club described in one of my earlies postings. Across the street there's park with next to it the Iron House designed by Eiffel.
It's a sharp contrast towards where we are now. Our current temp offices are in the middle of a very posh residential area. If I look out the windows there's no way you can tell you're in Africa. Okay, apart from the guards that stand in front of every house.
9. What will be the name of this bank?
BANCO TERRA, O BANCO DA NOSSA TERRA! Say it loud and say it proud! (Guess the movie!) Why do I say it proud? Simply because I am at the roots of this bank. Not just a bank. No, the first real Mozambican commercial bank! It is not a foreign bank that opened a branch here, but a local bank. Admittedly funded for a large part by European money, but still a local bank. Let us have a look at my crystal ball..... The year is 2026 and I'm sitting in an Cuban stadium in Havana watching the world cup football semi-final between Holland and Mozambique. On the bench, the African reserve players and coaches are wearing jackets with the Banco Terra logo on it and I lean over to your grandchildren and say "did you know that uncle Roberto was in the small team that set up that bank?" How cool would that be!? I am, of course, referring to Holland being in a semi final...
10. What type of nut is available in huge numbers in this country?
I loooooooove nuts. I hardly eat chocolate, candy or crisps. When I want to much on something, it's nuts. Not peanuts, but actual nuts. I adore pistachios, walnuts, almonds, hazel nuts and my favourites: Brazil nuts and pecans. But no, here there's only one single nut available. The cashew nut. Together with macadamians my least favourite nut. And it is really the only one you can find here. I have not even seen cans of mixed nuts yet. Oh well...
11. Approximately how many times can you fit Holland in Mozambique?
This one nobody answered correctly. Even though it is quite simple to calculate. Go to the CIA's World Factbook (never leave home without it!) which you can find in the my links section on the right labelled "Facts & Figures" and look up the area sizes for both countries and perform the calculation. And you know, the CIA is never wrong! Never! And Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone! And Iraq had weapons of mass destruction! And Fidel Castro is still a major threat!
There's one slight issue with this calculation. The factbook states land, water and total area separately. Now what should you take? Do you compare land areas? Or do you compare total areas? My logic, but that is not necessarily your logic or any logic at all, says that thou shall take land area as including water is not totally fair. For example, Holland's water area is about 18% of the total area. And are territorial waters included? That would make Canada even bigger! Oh well, everybody answered 20 times, whereas comparing water areas gives you a factor of 19 (actually 19.3) and land areas results in 23 times bigger! On a side note, the population of Mozambique is 20 million, as opposed to 16 million in Cheeseland.
And in case more people got the same number of correct answers, we had the tie-breaker where the closest one to the correct answer wins.
12. How many beers were there on my July hotel bill?
This was obviously by far the toughest question. Okay, I admit. I do enjoy the occasional beer. Actually enjoy the regular beer even more! But I am a social drinker, meaning that I drink in company. For those of you who've been to my place and have had a look in my fridge - and since I'm the kind that will serve you once and after that just point at the refrigerator, most of the visitor have - will have noticed that there's very seldom beer in there. I do not drink beer at home and drinking in the hotel bar is a bit like drinking at home (No, I do not employ bar staff at home. I wish!).
So the number of beers on my hotel bill is actually limited to a few I had with colleagues staying in the same hotel. Actually the bill is tainted as the beers I offered to these colleagues are also on my hotel bill. But then again, the question did not refer to the beers I drank, but to the ones on the bill. The correct answer should've been..... drum roll........ 14! Yes, that is fourteen. The number made famous by that other J.C. That's logical!
So, now you know all the correct answers and know how many you had wrong. All entries have been carefully reviewed by Robertole Lopelulu Abukaramirez from the renowned, respected and trusted accounting firm Arthur Andersen and there was a clear winner. The tie breaker was not necessary as Frits beat out the rest by answering 10 out of the first 11 correctly. Parabens!
In the meanwhile the award ceremony was almost cancelled due to a lack of a prize. That was still inside my suitcase somewhere between Dar Es Salaam and Amsterdam. Luckily for me and Frits (and Kenya Airways), the suitcase found its way back to me. And only a day and a half later. Suitcase and owner are doing fine and can be visited during the day. Please make an appointment.
Thursday, 6 September 2007
Cannot Airways!
This latest posting, I apologise to all quiz entrants, is not the second part of the results, but an article on the latest developments. I am now sitting in seat 10F of an MD-11 (that’s a plane) that just left out of Dar Es Salaam on its way to Amsterdam. Nothing strange about that, you would think. Well, think again! My ticket says Maputo-Nairobi with Kenya Airways followed by Nairobi-Amsterdam with KLM. So what am I doing in an Amsterdam bound flight out of Tanzania? Let’s go back in time… (fuzzy image, fade out)
The days started fine. The alarm clock (well, actually the automated hotel wake up call that goes something like “good mooning! theez eez yo wakup col’ followed by music even an elevator would not dare to play) went at the planned time of 07:00 hrs. As my mini-break started the night before with some 12/M’s (the beer’s called 2/M, but I think I had six or so) I wasn’t entirely fresh but hey! It’s a holiday! After taking a shower I dropped some of my clothes in a colleagues room as I don’t want to go back and forth with all this stuff I don’t need in Holland anyway. I went down for breakfast and took my time. Some nice sunny-side-up fried eggs followed by a fresh fruits salad. I was feeling better already! The hotel-airport transfer was arranged for 09:20 and was very much on time. In Maputo the protocol is to be at the airport 2 hours before departure and the hotel adds another 30 minutes to that. They say it’s to be on the safe side, even though the biggest traffic jam I’ve seen in these three months was the line of 7 cars waiting on the Macaneta ferry (see one of the first articles on this blog).
Before checking in, the suitcase is scanned and some dude takes it out of the scanner and rolls your suitcase to the check-in line some 3 meters further away. This amazing piece of service sets you back a few Meticais, but… what the h! I’m in a good mood. Checking in went smoothly and then comes the long wait for my first flight. During this entire wait you ask yourself: why again did I show up this early? Luckily, the KQ (that is how every African calls Kenya Airways) flight arrived on time and we boarded. Then the first delay started. Some passenger was late. We wait and wait and finally a rasta dude shows up accompanied by two very official looking Brits. Official as in security officials. Later I hear this guy went to England, was refused entrance there and was escorted back to Mozambique by British immigration officials. Now he was back in a plane to return to England once again (via Nairobi) as Mozambique refused him too, as it was not possible to establish his nationality. When asked he would answer ‘I’m a citizen of the world!”.
So finally we departed out of Maputo with about an hours delay. No problem! I had more than 4 hours wait at Nairobi anyway so what could go wrong? The flight to Nairobi made one stop at Harare. That is in Zimbabwe, which as you might know is ruled by president Mugabe. This is the president that a few years back repossessed all farms from white farmers which was quite a bloody mess. One of his latest ploys is to not allow companies with majority foreign ownership So yes, foreign investors are running. Logical result: the economy of Zim (as everybody around here calls it) is collapsing.
So we’re there in Harare and looking out the window, I see a fuel truck next to the plane and 6 guys (!) involved. I remember wondering why you needed 6 guys to fuel a plane. A few minutes later I found out what was really going on. The 6 guys were there discussing the amount of fuel. It turns out that due to the collapse of the local economy there are fuel shortages and Mugabe had decided to ration fuel distribution. Even for regular scheduled flights! Like a plane is supposed to cover the same distance with less fuel! Not his problem!
So the KQ captain came up with a new plan. He had enough fuel to fly to Dar Es Salaam. There we would refuel and continue our journey to Nairobi. Total additional time? Less than an hour. I was still looking good. Still two hours to switch planes in Kenya. Should be enough, even for my suitcase.
Just before landing in Tanzania, the purser starts collecting all the head phones. I ask him why, as we still had the last leg to Nairobi ahead of us. His answer: “the captain wants us to”. This is where I started getting a little bit suspicious. We landed (actually bounced) in Tanzania, taxied to the gate and then it became very quiet. Looking out the window, no fuel truck. Also no announcements by the captain. Everybody just looking at each other with question marks on their foreheads. Finally the captain gets on the mic and starts his sentence with ‘Unfortunately…”. Noooooooooooooo, I had heard that word so often already on this flight! Unfortunately the crew was out of their hours, meaning they had flown up to the allowed legal limit and where therefore not allowed to fly us to Nairobi.
Of course, there’s no crew readily available in Dar Es Salaam. They have to be flown in from Nairobi. And it was expected that they would arrive in 3 to 4 hours time. Bye bye KLM connection in Nairobi! At that moment I knew I would spend 5 hours waiting on the airport in Tanzania, go to Nairobi, get into an airport hotel booked by the airline and pray they can rebook me on the morning KQ flight or on the next KLM flight (which would be 24 hours later).
Of course the captain apologised and promised we would be well fed and telephone services would be made available to contact my loved ones (that’s all of you of course). So after 30 minutes waiting in the plane, we were led to a closed section of the airport restaurant where a buffet was looking eager to be eaten. One problem: there was absolutely no one from the airline or even from the airport available. The transfer desk people probably expected to be bombarded with questions and fled. The KQ people obviously thought that attending to their stranded customers was not a priority. And the phones? Yeah right!
After a few minutes of looking around I noticed a departures screen which said that there would be a KLM flight from Kilimanjaro, passing by Dar Es Salaam on its way to Amsterdam. This is when the big search started. Forget searching for Easter eggs, finding your ideal job or even the love of your life. Finding a KLM, KQ or Transfer Desk staff member on Dar Es Salaam airport is the real challenge! There we were, me and 3 girls who were also booked on my flights, running from left to right, stopping every person wearing a uniform to ask if they were or knew anyone from those companies. Everybody was very sympathetic. When we asked them if they could contact someone to come and talk to us they all answered ‘Yes, we understand. Yes’ and went on with their whatever-they-were-doing.
So we decided to risk it and enter the country, meaning, we passed immigration to try to find the KLM check-in counter. That could potentially mean, filling in forms, paying for a visa and be subject to airport tax again. One of the girls charmed the immigration officer to let us through without all that hassle. You should’ve seen the dude. He was eating out of her hand. Okay, she was cute, but still… He took our passports hostage and we were on our way to the desk. There our hope quickly vanished. The desk head didn’t look eager to help us and stated repeatedly that they were overbooked and we should not expect anything. We went back, got our passports again from the love puppy and were ready to surrender.
That is when Mister Karanja appeared! I call him Mister with a capital M, because he is THE MAN! There was still not a single KQ guy attending to the passenger, but Mister K, actually working for KLM, decided to attend to these poor people. And he didn’t have to, as it was a KQ problem. After patiently having talked to everyone it was our turn. We explained the situation and how we would really like to be transferred to this KLM flight from the Nairobi one, if he had seats available of course. He said ‘Yes, I understand. Yes’ and went on. For a few minutes we sank back in our chairs not expecting much from it, but no. Is it a bird? A plane? No! It’s Mister K! And he wanted my luggage tag! That was not yet the same as receiving a boarding pass, but very close to it!
The sad part (well, to be honest, not for me), he only asked for my luggage tag. And yes, an hour later he returned once again with a boarding pass for me, but not for the girls, as he had only one available seat. Being the total gentleman that I am, I properly said my goodbyes and rushed off for the gate! Vamos emborra! So, after yet again an eventful set of flights, I was finally on board a plane going to Amsterdam and the arrival time was only 90 minutes later than my original flight from Nairobi.
(This last part is written while on the Schiphol train to Utrecht)
Needless to say, my suitcase did not make it yet again. I guess it is in Nairobi. Either my suitcase really loves Nairobi or KQ can just not say goodbye to it. I have now flown KQ twice and both times I arrived without my precious box of - now dirty - clothes. Oh well, I guess KLM will just have to drop it at my doorstep somewhere in the next few days.
The days started fine. The alarm clock (well, actually the automated hotel wake up call that goes something like “good mooning! theez eez yo wakup col’ followed by music even an elevator would not dare to play) went at the planned time of 07:00 hrs. As my mini-break started the night before with some 12/M’s (the beer’s called 2/M, but I think I had six or so) I wasn’t entirely fresh but hey! It’s a holiday! After taking a shower I dropped some of my clothes in a colleagues room as I don’t want to go back and forth with all this stuff I don’t need in Holland anyway. I went down for breakfast and took my time. Some nice sunny-side-up fried eggs followed by a fresh fruits salad. I was feeling better already! The hotel-airport transfer was arranged for 09:20 and was very much on time. In Maputo the protocol is to be at the airport 2 hours before departure and the hotel adds another 30 minutes to that. They say it’s to be on the safe side, even though the biggest traffic jam I’ve seen in these three months was the line of 7 cars waiting on the Macaneta ferry (see one of the first articles on this blog).
Before checking in, the suitcase is scanned and some dude takes it out of the scanner and rolls your suitcase to the check-in line some 3 meters further away. This amazing piece of service sets you back a few Meticais, but… what the h! I’m in a good mood. Checking in went smoothly and then comes the long wait for my first flight. During this entire wait you ask yourself: why again did I show up this early? Luckily, the KQ (that is how every African calls Kenya Airways) flight arrived on time and we boarded. Then the first delay started. Some passenger was late. We wait and wait and finally a rasta dude shows up accompanied by two very official looking Brits. Official as in security officials. Later I hear this guy went to England, was refused entrance there and was escorted back to Mozambique by British immigration officials. Now he was back in a plane to return to England once again (via Nairobi) as Mozambique refused him too, as it was not possible to establish his nationality. When asked he would answer ‘I’m a citizen of the world!”.
So finally we departed out of Maputo with about an hours delay. No problem! I had more than 4 hours wait at Nairobi anyway so what could go wrong? The flight to Nairobi made one stop at Harare. That is in Zimbabwe, which as you might know is ruled by president Mugabe. This is the president that a few years back repossessed all farms from white farmers which was quite a bloody mess. One of his latest ploys is to not allow companies with majority foreign ownership So yes, foreign investors are running. Logical result: the economy of Zim (as everybody around here calls it) is collapsing.
So we’re there in Harare and looking out the window, I see a fuel truck next to the plane and 6 guys (!) involved. I remember wondering why you needed 6 guys to fuel a plane. A few minutes later I found out what was really going on. The 6 guys were there discussing the amount of fuel. It turns out that due to the collapse of the local economy there are fuel shortages and Mugabe had decided to ration fuel distribution. Even for regular scheduled flights! Like a plane is supposed to cover the same distance with less fuel! Not his problem!
So the KQ captain came up with a new plan. He had enough fuel to fly to Dar Es Salaam. There we would refuel and continue our journey to Nairobi. Total additional time? Less than an hour. I was still looking good. Still two hours to switch planes in Kenya. Should be enough, even for my suitcase.
Just before landing in Tanzania, the purser starts collecting all the head phones. I ask him why, as we still had the last leg to Nairobi ahead of us. His answer: “the captain wants us to”. This is where I started getting a little bit suspicious. We landed (actually bounced) in Tanzania, taxied to the gate and then it became very quiet. Looking out the window, no fuel truck. Also no announcements by the captain. Everybody just looking at each other with question marks on their foreheads. Finally the captain gets on the mic and starts his sentence with ‘Unfortunately…”. Noooooooooooooo, I had heard that word so often already on this flight! Unfortunately the crew was out of their hours, meaning they had flown up to the allowed legal limit and where therefore not allowed to fly us to Nairobi.
Of course, there’s no crew readily available in Dar Es Salaam. They have to be flown in from Nairobi. And it was expected that they would arrive in 3 to 4 hours time. Bye bye KLM connection in Nairobi! At that moment I knew I would spend 5 hours waiting on the airport in Tanzania, go to Nairobi, get into an airport hotel booked by the airline and pray they can rebook me on the morning KQ flight or on the next KLM flight (which would be 24 hours later).
Of course the captain apologised and promised we would be well fed and telephone services would be made available to contact my loved ones (that’s all of you of course). So after 30 minutes waiting in the plane, we were led to a closed section of the airport restaurant where a buffet was looking eager to be eaten. One problem: there was absolutely no one from the airline or even from the airport available. The transfer desk people probably expected to be bombarded with questions and fled. The KQ people obviously thought that attending to their stranded customers was not a priority. And the phones? Yeah right!
After a few minutes of looking around I noticed a departures screen which said that there would be a KLM flight from Kilimanjaro, passing by Dar Es Salaam on its way to Amsterdam. This is when the big search started. Forget searching for Easter eggs, finding your ideal job or even the love of your life. Finding a KLM, KQ or Transfer Desk staff member on Dar Es Salaam airport is the real challenge! There we were, me and 3 girls who were also booked on my flights, running from left to right, stopping every person wearing a uniform to ask if they were or knew anyone from those companies. Everybody was very sympathetic. When we asked them if they could contact someone to come and talk to us they all answered ‘Yes, we understand. Yes’ and went on with their whatever-they-were-doing.
So we decided to risk it and enter the country, meaning, we passed immigration to try to find the KLM check-in counter. That could potentially mean, filling in forms, paying for a visa and be subject to airport tax again. One of the girls charmed the immigration officer to let us through without all that hassle. You should’ve seen the dude. He was eating out of her hand. Okay, she was cute, but still… He took our passports hostage and we were on our way to the desk. There our hope quickly vanished. The desk head didn’t look eager to help us and stated repeatedly that they were overbooked and we should not expect anything. We went back, got our passports again from the love puppy and were ready to surrender.
That is when Mister Karanja appeared! I call him Mister with a capital M, because he is THE MAN! There was still not a single KQ guy attending to the passenger, but Mister K, actually working for KLM, decided to attend to these poor people. And he didn’t have to, as it was a KQ problem. After patiently having talked to everyone it was our turn. We explained the situation and how we would really like to be transferred to this KLM flight from the Nairobi one, if he had seats available of course. He said ‘Yes, I understand. Yes’ and went on. For a few minutes we sank back in our chairs not expecting much from it, but no. Is it a bird? A plane? No! It’s Mister K! And he wanted my luggage tag! That was not yet the same as receiving a boarding pass, but very close to it!
The sad part (well, to be honest, not for me), he only asked for my luggage tag. And yes, an hour later he returned once again with a boarding pass for me, but not for the girls, as he had only one available seat. Being the total gentleman that I am, I properly said my goodbyes and rushed off for the gate! Vamos emborra! So, after yet again an eventful set of flights, I was finally on board a plane going to Amsterdam and the arrival time was only 90 minutes later than my original flight from Nairobi.
(This last part is written while on the Schiphol train to Utrecht)
Needless to say, my suitcase did not make it yet again. I guess it is in Nairobi. Either my suitcase really loves Nairobi or KQ can just not say goodbye to it. I have now flown KQ twice and both times I arrived without my precious box of - now dirty - clothes. Oh well, I guess KLM will just have to drop it at my doorstep somewhere in the next few days.
Saturday, 1 September 2007
The Results Are In!
Yes, August 31st is now behind us and that means that the Maputo Memoirs Quiz is now closed. No more entries are accepted... unless accompanied by a 'refresco' which translates to refreshment, and is local police language for what is known in Brazil as a 'jeitinho'. It usually consists of a friendly handshake where some content is transferred over (from you to them of course). This content not being a refreshment...
I started writing down all answers to the question and elaborated a bit too much on these. As I do not want to let all this typing go to waste, I decided to keep the suspense as high as possible and cut the article in two. You will therefore have to wait another few days for part II of the answers and the announcement of the winner. I hope your heart can handle the suspense!
(And as I'm very busy at work, since I'll be out of the office during my home leave these coming weeks. It is therefore quite convenient to have the next blog entry already prepared...)
So, let me not keep you waiting much longer. Grab your answer sheets and keep score!
1. How many countries share a land border with Mozambique?
Probably the easiest one out there. Just look at any map. Well, at least one with the African continent on it.... and with land borders... and not older than 15 years as country names do have a tendency to change on this continent. You will see that this country borders (from north to south) the following six countries: United Republic of Tanzania, Malawi, Zambia, Zimbabwe, South-Africa and Swaziland (and then South Africa again). On the east side after a long swim you will arrive on the beaches of Madagascar, but as it technically does not border Mozambique, it is excluded.
In November James and I intend to visit Swaziland and South Africa during a short holiday to conclude my assignment here. If I don't return, I've probably been eaten by a lion, shot by James (who is from Brooklyn, so you never know) or run over by a hippo. Despite its popularity in zoos and cuddly portrayal in cartoons, the hippopotamus is among the most dangerous and aggressive of all mammals (didn't expect that, did you?).
2. How do you say 'shrimp' in Portuguese
That would be camarão and is the first and only thing you should look for when visiting a Mozambican sea food restaurant for the first time. I've said it before and I'll say it again, shrimp is the thing to eat here. I've eaten I don't know how many shrimp since I got here and it is soooooo good. Even the vegetarians love it. A vegetarian friend of mine here decided to quit her belief for one night to enjoy the local delicacy. Actually come to think of it, she's been sick ever since! (but I don't think from the shrimp).
The shrimp is the most important catch for the country’s fisheries sector. But shrimp, just like everything else actually, have been overfished. In the 1980s they would catch about 80 kilos an hour. Now they catch 26 kilos an hour. To try to conserve the little buggers the government is no longer issuing new licences to fish for them... at least in theory, since a nice 'refreshment' can get you everything here.
3. Which football legend was born in Mozambique?
...but actually never played for this country. He was born and raised here in Lourenço Marques (former Portuguese name of Maputo), but his talent got noticed by the Portuguese, who at that time still occupied Moçambique, resulting in his move to the Iberian peninsula in his late teens. There, 'the Black Pearl' played at the club Benfica for 15 years, and is the team's all-time top scorer. He got international recognition in the 1962 European Cup final 5-3 win over the then dominant Real Madrid and was elected European footballer of the year in 1965.
During the World Cup 1966 in England, he helped Portugal reach third place, being the top goalscorer of the tournament. Remember? The one world cup were, for a change, the Germans got robbed in a final (do I hear a cheer coming from Hungary, Holland and Argentina? and a big boohoo from England?). Of course I am talking about Eusébio Ferreira da Silva
4. What is the name of the local currency?
The Metical Nova, the new Metical (plural: Meticais). Not so long ago they had only one Metical (now known as the old one) which replaced the Portuguese Escudo in 1980 and everyone was a millionaire! Beverly Hills was nothing compared to Maputo. People earned and spent millions! The average monthly salary was 1,500,000 Meticais! And that was just for a job as a doorman! Obviously this meant that you needed a wallet the size of a backpack in case you wanted to buy a suit and pay cash (since paying in stores with a bank card was not common).
The Metical underwent severe inflation. After the revaluation of Romanian Leu (yes, Cosmin was once a millionaire too), the Metical briefly became the least valued currency in the world, at a value of about 24,500 Meticais per USD, until the Zimbabwean Dollar took this prestigious title in August 2005.
In July 2006 they switched to the new Metical by basically crossing out the 3 trailing zeroes. One of the funny consequences of this is that now most locals totally mix the words Thousand and Million. Even in their own Portuguese language. Basically when counting hundred Metical notes they say: "seven hundred... eight hundred... nine hundred... one million". I guess it is tough not to be a millionaire any more.
5. What is the most spoken first language in this country?
Once again the CIA comes to the rescue. Where would the world be without them...? But, back to the question. This was a slightly tricky one, as first instinct would be to answer Portuguese, which is the most spoken language here. However, it is not the first/native language for most people. On the subject of first languages, the factbook states (in order): Emakhuwa 26.1%, Xichangana 11.3% and Portuguese 8.8%, followed by over 10 (!) local tribal languages.
Xichangana (pronounce: Shjangana) is the language of the South and therefore most heard in Maputo. All Mozambican languages are all so-called Bantu-languages and these were introduced through migrations by tribes from Central Africa.
Why so many languages in one country? The creation of Mozambique – just as the creation of other African states, like for example Nigeria where you could actually split it up in 3 different countries, which would probably be best for them anyway – was done without regard to the local conditions, tribes, culture, language etc. This took place in Berlin around 1885, where the European countries sat down to share Africa. A bit like playing Monopoly. Can I get this street and then I'll give you that other one in return? The idea was to give the land to the power who had that particular area under control. Funny enough, Portugal did not have control over Mozambique, but still it got the right to have this as a colony. Strange huh? Maybe a refresco?
6. (Tough one) How do you say 'Thank You' in this language?
Once you had the answer to the previous question, finding the answer to this one would be a question of proper googling. Entering +emakhuwa +"thank you" in the Google search box would give you some 56 results from which a few contain simple dictionary. There you will find that the proper way to say 'thank you' in that language is Asantte.
Of course, if your answer to question 5 was Portuguese, you would've answered obrigado and/or obrigada to this question, depending on whether you are a boy or girl (to find the answer to that dilemma please measure the amount of time you need to get ready for an evening out. If it is over 30 minutes there's a 90+ percent chance you're a girl and therefore should say 'obrigada' to your impatiently waiting boyfriend for putting up with your dressing ritual...).
If you answered Xichangana (and I have no clue why, unless you're British... Hi Chris! Now you know which questions you answered incorrectly) on the previous question, your answer here would be Kanimambo.
That was it! The answers to the first 6 question. Keep an eye on this blog for the next few days (and the other on your boss in case he walks by, so you can quickly minimize this screen and pretend you were working) for the following six anwers and..... the Winner!!!
I started writing down all answers to the question and elaborated a bit too much on these. As I do not want to let all this typing go to waste, I decided to keep the suspense as high as possible and cut the article in two. You will therefore have to wait another few days for part II of the answers and the announcement of the winner. I hope your heart can handle the suspense!
(And as I'm very busy at work, since I'll be out of the office during my home leave these coming weeks. It is therefore quite convenient to have the next blog entry already prepared...)
So, let me not keep you waiting much longer. Grab your answer sheets and keep score!
1. How many countries share a land border with Mozambique?
Probably the easiest one out there. Just look at any map. Well, at least one with the African continent on it.... and with land borders... and not older than 15 years as country names do have a tendency to change on this continent. You will see that this country borders (from north to south) the following six countries: United Republic of Tanzania, Malawi, Zambia, Zimbabwe, South-Africa and Swaziland (and then South Africa again). On the east side after a long swim you will arrive on the beaches of Madagascar, but as it technically does not border Mozambique, it is excluded.
In November James and I intend to visit Swaziland and South Africa during a short holiday to conclude my assignment here. If I don't return, I've probably been eaten by a lion, shot by James (who is from Brooklyn, so you never know) or run over by a hippo. Despite its popularity in zoos and cuddly portrayal in cartoons, the hippopotamus is among the most dangerous and aggressive of all mammals (didn't expect that, did you?).
2. How do you say 'shrimp' in Portuguese
That would be camarão and is the first and only thing you should look for when visiting a Mozambican sea food restaurant for the first time. I've said it before and I'll say it again, shrimp is the thing to eat here. I've eaten I don't know how many shrimp since I got here and it is soooooo good. Even the vegetarians love it. A vegetarian friend of mine here decided to quit her belief for one night to enjoy the local delicacy. Actually come to think of it, she's been sick ever since! (but I don't think from the shrimp).
The shrimp is the most important catch for the country’s fisheries sector. But shrimp, just like everything else actually, have been overfished. In the 1980s they would catch about 80 kilos an hour. Now they catch 26 kilos an hour. To try to conserve the little buggers the government is no longer issuing new licences to fish for them... at least in theory, since a nice 'refreshment' can get you everything here.
3. Which football legend was born in Mozambique?
...but actually never played for this country. He was born and raised here in Lourenço Marques (former Portuguese name of Maputo), but his talent got noticed by the Portuguese, who at that time still occupied Moçambique, resulting in his move to the Iberian peninsula in his late teens. There, 'the Black Pearl' played at the club Benfica for 15 years, and is the team's all-time top scorer. He got international recognition in the 1962 European Cup final 5-3 win over the then dominant Real Madrid and was elected European footballer of the year in 1965.
During the World Cup 1966 in England, he helped Portugal reach third place, being the top goalscorer of the tournament. Remember? The one world cup were, for a change, the Germans got robbed in a final (do I hear a cheer coming from Hungary, Holland and Argentina? and a big boohoo from England?). Of course I am talking about Eusébio Ferreira da Silva
4. What is the name of the local currency?
The Metical Nova, the new Metical (plural: Meticais). Not so long ago they had only one Metical (now known as the old one) which replaced the Portuguese Escudo in 1980 and everyone was a millionaire! Beverly Hills was nothing compared to Maputo. People earned and spent millions! The average monthly salary was 1,500,000 Meticais! And that was just for a job as a doorman! Obviously this meant that you needed a wallet the size of a backpack in case you wanted to buy a suit and pay cash (since paying in stores with a bank card was not common).
The Metical underwent severe inflation. After the revaluation of Romanian Leu (yes, Cosmin was once a millionaire too), the Metical briefly became the least valued currency in the world, at a value of about 24,500 Meticais per USD, until the Zimbabwean Dollar took this prestigious title in August 2005.
In July 2006 they switched to the new Metical by basically crossing out the 3 trailing zeroes. One of the funny consequences of this is that now most locals totally mix the words Thousand and Million. Even in their own Portuguese language. Basically when counting hundred Metical notes they say: "seven hundred... eight hundred... nine hundred... one million". I guess it is tough not to be a millionaire any more.
5. What is the most spoken first language in this country?
Once again the CIA comes to the rescue. Where would the world be without them...? But, back to the question. This was a slightly tricky one, as first instinct would be to answer Portuguese, which is the most spoken language here. However, it is not the first/native language for most people. On the subject of first languages, the factbook states (in order): Emakhuwa 26.1%, Xichangana 11.3% and Portuguese 8.8%, followed by over 10 (!) local tribal languages.
Xichangana (pronounce: Shjangana) is the language of the South and therefore most heard in Maputo. All Mozambican languages are all so-called Bantu-languages and these were introduced through migrations by tribes from Central Africa.
Why so many languages in one country? The creation of Mozambique – just as the creation of other African states, like for example Nigeria where you could actually split it up in 3 different countries, which would probably be best for them anyway – was done without regard to the local conditions, tribes, culture, language etc. This took place in Berlin around 1885, where the European countries sat down to share Africa. A bit like playing Monopoly. Can I get this street and then I'll give you that other one in return? The idea was to give the land to the power who had that particular area under control. Funny enough, Portugal did not have control over Mozambique, but still it got the right to have this as a colony. Strange huh? Maybe a refresco?
6. (Tough one) How do you say 'Thank You' in this language?
Once you had the answer to the previous question, finding the answer to this one would be a question of proper googling. Entering +emakhuwa +"thank you" in the Google search box would give you some 56 results from which a few contain simple dictionary. There you will find that the proper way to say 'thank you' in that language is Asantte.
Of course, if your answer to question 5 was Portuguese, you would've answered obrigado and/or obrigada to this question, depending on whether you are a boy or girl (to find the answer to that dilemma please measure the amount of time you need to get ready for an evening out. If it is over 30 minutes there's a 90+ percent chance you're a girl and therefore should say 'obrigada' to your impatiently waiting boyfriend for putting up with your dressing ritual...).
If you answered Xichangana (and I have no clue why, unless you're British... Hi Chris! Now you know which questions you answered incorrectly) on the previous question, your answer here would be Kanimambo.
That was it! The answers to the first 6 question. Keep an eye on this blog for the next few days (and the other on your boss in case he walks by, so you can quickly minimize this screen and pretend you were working) for the following six anwers and..... the Winner!!!
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